Last Post For 2009

Here it is, December 31, 2009 and I am excitedly counting down until it 2010.

Followers know this has not been a good year for me personally and I am glad it is coming to an end. I will not miss any part of it. I do take me with lots of accomplishments but I also could take with me alot of heartache. We as a family have learned alot this year. More about people in general, the good and the bad of humanity, more bad than good, but we are ditching it and leaving it behind. We leave it behind and we grasp on to that we have each other if nothing else. Having each other means the world to us, but we are more blessed than we ever could imagine with a group of friends that are more like extended family!

So for 2010, I feel it. This is going to be my year! God Bless each of you that read this crazy blog. Again, my outlet for what I learn from life and my training.

2010 will be rung in with my running "sisters" and I say that because they are more than friends to me. We are running tonight at midnight and we just keep going all the way to Cincinnati OH for the Flying Pig Marathon in May.

Happy New Year!

I have let my public down

I hate to report that I wimped out on Saturday! Yes I was supposed to run the Mistletoe Half Marathon in Winston Salem, NC (aka hill central) and I backed out.

This is how it started. I was emailing another runner on Friday discussing the weather and we pretty much decided that it wasn't worth being cold and miserable for 13.1 miles. Then, I got a message from Jess later on asking where we running rain, shine or sleet? I think that is how it went. I quickly replied, NO if too cold and raining but I would be backing down to the 5K. She kindly agreed and we our plan was set.

I woke up Saturday morning with my new best friend Lucy. A beautiful yellow lab who has not quite mastered holding it all night at 4:45 a.m. No rain... I was sad! Then when I woke back up at 6:00 a.m. it was pouring! I mean cold and pouring the rain. OK decision made. 5K'ing it I was. I had to run something so I could wear my new t-shirt. Then Jess texted that she wasn't going at all because her almost 1 year old had not slept good. Yeah ok blame it on the baby ! Just kidding Jessica! Good, now I don't have to tell my bully of a running friend that I was backing down! Bailing out, however you want to look at it.

We got over there and wow there were a lot of people there. I was shocked as I just knew people would not show up due to the very poor weather conditions. NOT! Too many people actually for my liking in a 5K. What you had were three kids running groups and lots of adults who must not really run on a regular basis as they didn't know race etiquette very well.

Let me tell you how I see race etiquette! Elites in the front of the pack. Faster than average next in line. Slower runners and so on and so on. Except, if you are a run/walker, there is nothing wrong with that. But please start toward the back and stay to the right. If you are 5 years old and your parents drug you out in the cold pouring rain, please beg them to start in the very back. If you are going to stop right in the middle of the race and almost knock the runner behind you down, say excuse me, I am so sorry! If your a dad and your wife sent you out in the cold pouring rain because you work too much and need to spend time with your children, please do not carry your umbrellas while trying to run with your child. Someone will get their eye poked out!

I think you get the jest of how this race went. I think my favorite line though from the entire race is "Mom, I can't feel my legs. Honey, do you want to hold mommies hand?" Yeah like that is going to make it all better! Ha Ha hee hee, we got a good laugh at that one and it was before the kid had even reached mile 1! Wonder how the rest of that conversation went?

This is one race I totally was sad I didn't have a camera. You should of seen me, John, Kay and Christine in our matching Hefty bags. Of course being the fashion divas that we are, we made them our own. Mine was a onesie, Christine was the armless runner, Kay the slutty runner and John just a man in tights with a trash bag on! It was funny and picture worthy!

So public, thank you for your encouragement. I am sorry I let you down ! If you don't know this, I am going to tell you! I am a HUGE baby when it comes to rain! It might mess my hair up! (DISCLAIMER: RUNNING PARTNERS YOUR NOT ALLOWED TO COMMENT ON ME BEING A BABY)

The Mistletoe Half Marathon

Tomorrow, my friends and I will be running the above mentioned race! Of course we are all trained up and ready. Our plan is to always stay trained well enough for a half and then we will feel great when we find our next marathon to run. But some of us are not as motivated as the others. That would be ME! I am just not feeling it. I am especially not feeling it due to the weather forecast tomorrow. Cold, rain and maybe some snow mixed in there. I love snow! I mean love it!

That is not the part I am dreading. I am dreading the pounding my body is going to take. Not like it is not use to it, but I am just wishing this was over. I need to be positive but I am not finding it in my feet right now. I know, I am just being a big huge baby! I sure hope that a good nights sleep, brings a different attitude tomorrow!

Wish me luck. Although, I think I am gonna need more like a miracle!

Slacker Award Goes To.....AMY BARRETT

Thank you, thank you so much...I was not expecting this! Yes I was. It is Tuesday and I am not feeling it this week. For no certain reason that I can think of but I do not feel motivated in anyway to get moving.

I need to remember that my motivation to keep running during the cold months is that I honestly like it, once my body gets use to it. For that to happen I would have to get up and go wouldn't I? My other motivation found is that my running crew keeps me accountable. Girls, start cracking your whips! I am slacking off!

This weekend I am running a half marathon in Winston Salem. No PR's will be set on this course due to it's diffeculty, but none the less, I am running it!

Happy Tuesday and I hope your motivation is better than mine this week.

Ready for the 2010 Calendar

I found a site yesterday GoTribalnow.com for women triathletes. Haven't really figured it out yet but I think it is going to be a helpful network for me. With that hunting around, I figured it was time to start planning what my 2010 Race Calendar will look like. I had no idea how much and how many ideas I would have. Yes, I am even considering spring and fall marathons. I figure what the heck! I am already trained for it. I just need to keep pushing. John and I have set a hefty goal this year, so we need to start getting focused on what it takes.

Swimming is going to take priority this winter. I am going to once again take a swim class and then work with the masters group as much as I can. Of course I need all the help I can get. I am very confident with my running and cycling - climbing ability. Yes that is a minus climbing ability. I need some work there. I don't think it is a lack of strength as much as it is knowledge on gear shifting. Once, I can get that swim thing down I will feel so much better. White Lake of course is on my list. I am going back for one more TRI at that.

So with all that said and written, I have my calendar out, I am pulling up calendar of events on-line and oh, a training plan or two might be nice.

The Day After

I wrote a blog the other day that wasn't very nice so I am glad I kept in the edit box. It was all about what I wasn't thankful for this year. All the heartache and pain we as a family are feeling, the loss we feel, the memories that should be made at our house from now on and that aren't happening. You get it. But then I read another blog on all the things I should be thankful for. It did give me perspective and for a moment made me feel bad for being a "Debbie Downer". Then at lunch yesterday, my step-mom made each of say one thing we were thankful for and I yes had to think about it! But I gave an answer and we moved along.

All night, I thought about that game. Here we are the day after, my heart still hurts, the memories of yesterday were not made, my faith is still lost, but I am reflecting today on the memories that were made. The true friends that I do have, and a family, as dysfunctional as we all might be, that would walk to the wherever and back for me, for the two beautiful children I have been blessed with, the husband who for whatever reason, puts up with me and never fails to say I Love You! For all of you I am thankful.

Hope you all had a wonderful Thanksgiving.

Quote for the day

Nothing's better than the wind to your back, the sun in front of you, and your friends beside you.

Aaron Douglas Trimble, Runner

As you have heard a hundred times, I hate to run alone so the above quote today I felt was perfect for me.

It is hard for me to imagine how others get out and run and train all alone! Oh don't get me wrong, I have some in my group who will get up and run 20 miles all by themselves. I can just tell you that I wouldn't do it! A marathon would not ever have occured if I had to do that. I love to run but I love the company of someone right beside me. Like social drinkers, I am a social runner!

Happy running!

Return to Running

This has been a recovery week and it has sucked. I have felt like a cheater all week. I hear my other friends talking about their runs and text from them asking if I want to run 6 miles with them. Ha Ha, that was a funny one. As I couldn't really walk straight until after I saw Jeremy. Looked and felt like I think a 100 year old woman would feel.

With plans to see some other friends of mine run a half marathon in Danville on Saturday, I learned they had an 8K. I thought what the heck, I will register (yes they had tshirts) and just get the legs moving. I had no plans of trying to make a time that was respectable at all. I even said I would walk most of it. I just wanted to get out and do something. Seeing that I think I gained 5 lbs. last week as well. I needed some form of exercise. So with that being said, I registered.

This past week in good ole North Carolina fashion, our weather was horrible. I think after all was said and done we had like 5 to 6 inches of rain over the course of a few days. So the course in Danville, VA who obviously got more than we did was under water so they revised it. Yes to a much more difficult route. Go figure! I always wonder if they know Scott Bassett when you see that it starts on an uphill and ends on a slight uphill. He must be friends with everyone in the running world. I am convinced of it and calls to tell them how to make the most difficult of courses.

So as you already can tell this course was hard. Hard for me and I only ran 4.96 miles. My girls who ran the half, hats off and bows to you. YOU ROCKED THAT COURSE AND OWNED THOSE HILLS! Pan Connor came in first in her age group, Christine Flowe and Amy Rhyne both PR'd. WOO HOO! My girls rock!

We all started together but by mile 2 my shins felt like they would explode so I walked. I walked/ran the rest of the course and still my time was 50:22. I will take it and proudly I might add. During the race there was a girl that I would pass and then she would pass me, and as she did she would say "come on you can do it". How sweet of her to root me on like that. I kindly told her I knew I could, but I just ran a marathon less than 6 days ago. I would be perfectly fine with my little program I had going on. So when I finished before her (hee hee) I cheered her on to the finish.

Yes I ran against alot of people's better judgement. I feel great today though! Which I am very glad of because I will be honest, I was scared to see how my feet and legs would feel so soon after the marathon. Was I going to regret it? I don't so now I am getting my gear ready for a bike ride to honor our fallen cyclist David Sherman.

Happy Running.... This week I am back to a schedule, not sure which one yet, but I am oh, I plan to drop some weight. Not sure how, but I am going to work on that as well! Lots to do!

OBX 2009 Race Report

You have no idea how good it feels to type those words "race report". Long time coming. Short intro for the newbies to this blog and there are a couple.

Last year I trained for this race and was not able to run it due to an injury. I decided then that I was not going to let anything happen this year to keep me from crossing the finish line if it meant crawling across it! So here we are.....

Boy this has been a year. Lots of things personal and professional have happened. Some good, some very devastating and the devastation has happened recently so on Sunday when I sat out I ran this race for the loss in my life that I have and will feel for the rest of it. But a marathon is not planned or thought out quickly so this maybe the longest race report you have ever read...Just kidding. Training is training and those of you that run know the hours it takes. Those that don't run, your obviously my friends and you as well know what my family suffers through for me to train.

I am not sure how to write a race report that I feel good about. I am so use to complaining that now that I have something good to say I don't know where to start. So let me start with my about.com group. If I get this wrong they will correct me!

I joined a running forum last year when I started training to run this race. I got the best advice from several ladies on being a new runner. Wendy gave me wonderful advice along the way, then we found each other on facebook and we decided to run this race together. Wendy is my barefoot runner! Then the group grew. We kept a thread going for goodness I have no idea how long. A LONG TIME! We made our plans and those plans changed numerous times back and forth. The group has us all coming from NJ, VA, KY,TX,and PA. During the year we all had set backs of some kind and the RA girls setbacks are different than ones we as regular runners experience in my opinion. To days of not being able to run because your body just won't let you or just not having the energy because your body attacks itself, so I have such admiration at how they kept going. HATS OFF TO YOU GIRLS FOR YOUR DETERMINATION!

So our plan was to meet at the expo on Friday and we did. I got my number and my tech shirt. Yes I am tired of tech shirts, but I guess I won't be complaining when I don't have to buy any long sleeve ones anytime soon. So I just bought myself a regular t-shirt. We had a great dinner and went to our respective places to sleep. They camped and I had a hotel room because Jordan went with me.

Saturday morning was to be an early morning as Jeri was determined she was coming and running an event even with a bum leg. She did it, with those Viabrims for bare footers on I might add! I overslept and at least got to see her finish. Wendy's daughter ran the kids fun run barefooted as well. For a kid to run barefooted, I am so impressed. No one warned the poor thing about those crazy sand spurs. She looked miserable when we saw her but she got a big bright smile on her face and ran it in when she saw us and heard us cheering for her. We headed back to the Expo to enjoy some more OBX spirit. I got to see folks I know from home and that was exciting with all the people who would of thought. Then I went to rest the legs and nap. No nap was gotten due to the fact I had mental preparation to do.

I had been mentally preparing for a long time, with list and sayings of encouragement and just spending time in the moments of what it would be like to finish. But the list was taking over. I had to narrow down the outfits since I brought 5. Yes I brought 5 outfits to choose from. Clothes picked out and laid out, now rest. I tried. I never closed my eyes. Early dinner, the endless pasta bowl and perogies at The Flying Dutchman was the meal of choice. I have pictures but I am not posting all of those here. I will put them on Picasa and you can check them out later.

Early to bed, early to rise. I actually laid down at 7:45. Of course my blackberry was blowing up, so I finally turned it off and got to sleep and slept great. Got up at 5 a.m. had my planned out breakfast and coffee (of course). Got dressed, and was on my way to the start line. It wasn't that far from our hotel. Jordan dropped me off, Jill and Crystal picked me up and we there we were. At the start line to our first Marathon. At this point, the nerves took over and I felt like I was going to be ill. Time dwindled and it was it time to take our place. We found our pace group of 4:30. Yes I know, high ambition. But you can always drop back, hard to catch up. Our group I didn't think was paced well so a man I was beside, Steve Price and I ended up out front of them. We didn't look back. We were keeping a great pace and we felt good. You know I make a friend at every race I do. If I didn't, I wouldn't run. Steve and I talked and laughed for 24 miles. We loved hearing our names being cheered for, or for me, it was go Chatty Girl Go, since that is what my shirt said! Of course my feet hurt, but I knew that going in and I wasn't stopping. If I had to crawl across I would but I was finishing and that is what I told Steve. I would give you a mile by mile report but we would be here for days. This race is so well supported by the community and the going ons is just too much to write. Let's just say OBX knows how to turn it on when it comes to fun! Bloody Mary's, Tequila shots, beer, gummy bears and Reece's cups along the way. My kind of place! But at mile I think 5 or 6 I look to the right of me and it is Steve Mekita, a guy I trained with last year. So we caught up and ran together for a bit and then "my" Steve and I were off. Don't worry Steve M. caught us at mile 19. So from 19 on we would catch each other back and forth. It was fun and it was a goal. That went along with the 7 foot pirates who were run/walking and I was having a blast with them. So we cross a little bridge and we are like oh yeah that was nothing. Then we look up and seriously we both say "OH HELL" at the same time. Driving that bridge and running that bridge are night and day different. Well we decided to walk/run that bridge. My knee was killing me at that point so it was a walk/run from there on until Mile 24, when I knew I was almost there and it would be over and I thought I could come in under 5 hours. I wanted to finish in 4:45 but a potty break and the knee where not having that, so under 5 I would take. Hell I would be happy with a finish. So I kicked it in, left my two friends and I was on my way. I passed people and that felt good and I also got tired of hearing your almost there from the people in the cars eating McDonald's but that is to be expected. I promised I would never do that again at a race. Especially if I am watching a marathon. Because yes it may be all relative at that point that you only have 2.2 miles to go, but when it is you running those last few miles after running 24, yeah shut up folks. So I round the last half mile. I think that is when the smile hit. That is when I knew I had it and I knew I was finishing a goal that I made two years ago. I see the finish line, I make sure my number is turned around and then I hear "AMY BARNETT, JAMESTOWN, NORTH CAROLINA", ok I know it is me and I don't care that you just pronounced my name wrong. I have made it. I then hear yeah Amy, I knew my friends were there, but there were other people I knew. Lucy, Dawna and Elaine. Of course my daughter did not plan well so she couldn't get through the traffic to be at the finish line. Oh well no family at the finish line, but the best of friends where. First thing I did was text anyone who would care that I was done. When my husband called me, I think he was actually either crying or about to cry. How sweet! When he was probably thinking, thank God this is over. I had not been the nicest of wives toward the end just because of all that had been going on.

So to sum up my race report. I had a blast. Where I said I would not do it again, I lied. I would do it this weekend if I could. There is no feeling like it. I was trained very well (minus the training runs I missed do to whatever set back I had), I was fueled well, I was rested well, and I was mentally prepared. I had at no time any breakdown thinking I couldn't do it, I had no time where my body said you can't do it. Well my knee felt like it would blow out but nothing Dr. Jeremy Phillips can't put back together.

You know I am not sure what I would do different. This was such a great experience! I did what I set out to do and that was to finish and have fun. ACCOMPLISHED......Oh what will I do this coming year?

Thank you's

Now that today is behind me and I am officially a Marathon runner, I need to thank a few people that have pushed me, woke me up early and just stood right beside me through it all. In case your wondering I think my official time was 4:51 something.

John, Jordan and Ally...this race is for all you have given up due to my training schedule. You have had plenty of nights without me and waking up mornings with me gone. Things in our house fell by the wayside because I needed to run. Your an awesome family and I am blessed that your mine, even if I didn't show it. Pam Connor, for your wisdom, your encouragement, your constant friendship, your text, your prayers and Thursday night speed workouts! Christine, Kay and Amy R., for Saturday mornings of keeping me accountable and running right by my side, pushing me when I said I couldn't and of course listening to all the griping and complaining. Jess and Jill for your years of listening to the griping, complaining and talk radio. To all of you, your friendships, which mean more to me than that, you have become family to me! For my coach, Suzanne, girl you have earned every penny. I know I have been difficult throughout the entire year. But I am strong today because of you! Oh and you will be proud at mile 24, I said to myself, "is this all you have". I think it paid off.

This week someone made a comment, and a simple one at that. But it has pulled me through some dark moments and I want to thank her because I bet she didn't know at the time how it would effect me. Marisa, for the athlete that you are and the encouragement you give even though I am not in your group, Thank you! To all of my other friends, running and non-running, thank you in general for always asking how it is going and reassuring me I could do this. I am positive I have missed someone key to my life, but it doesn't mean I am not thanking you in my heart. OH my Chiropractor...how could I forget him! Dr. Jeremy Phillips has gotten my feet moving so that I can do this and if I promised on Facebook that if I couldn't do it he was who I was blaming first. Well, JP, I did it and now I better be the first person your client list for Tuesday! Because I need putting back together.

THANK YOU EVERYONE! I could not of done this without the role you play in my life! Yes, I am your needy friend and thanks for be there! YOU ALL ROCK!

Race report to follow soon!

One last time, thanks for all your friendships, your encouragement, your faith in me, and for just standing by me! I love you all! Sounds like a eulogy doesn't it? Well feel free to us it if you need to cause this might just be the death of me tomorrow! LOL!

GETTING NERVOUS

My time is drawing near...finally the nerves are kicking in and I AM SCARED TO DEATH.... I can't imagine what 26.2 miles running is going to feel like but I can only imagine that I am going to have to find some delirium some where around mile 20. For those of you that run with me I know your already feeling sorry for the people in this race around me! I am feeling sorry for them as well.

I saw Dr. JP this morning, the worlds best chiropractor! I told him this was like a last chance workout. He had to do his best this morning. So with that said I think my calves will be black and blue from his thumbs! I guess I should be glad and on Sunday I will be I am sure, but right now, not so much.

There seem to be alot of us GBORO folks going and I am wishing each of you good luck and hope I get to see you somewhere along the trail. OBX here we come.....

Positive Media Please

18 days and 14 hours as of right now until I run my first marathon and likely my last. This morning over my first cup of coffee what does my husbad tell me to read, an article about runners dying in half marathons. I reminded him of my life insurance policy.

You hear of it, you read about and while running the Virginia Beach Rock-N-Roll Half, they had a man die close to the finish line. I remember rounding the turn to the ambulance coming down the street and lifting up a prayer for that runner hoping they were o.k. Instead of the media focusing on how running causes death,could you focus on the benefit. In my mind I have an image of the person writing this article, he is a fat man, drinking a strong one, smoking while tying on an old typewriter,all the while thinking "stupid people".


As much as I complain about my weight, I have to remind myself that since I started running I have lost 40 pounds. I feel the best I have ever felt in my life. I no longer take depression medication nor is my anxiety as bad as it was. I sleep great most nights (when John isn't snoring). I think the benefit for me an most of us outweighs the negative. Could they please write that story!

Those are the ones I would like to read in the paper. For that, I have to go on-line. If you don't follow Runner Dude's Blog, you definately should. He spotligts runners all time! Thanks Thad aka Runner Dude for the outlet for normal runners to share the benefits they have gained from running. The news media should take a lesson or two from you!
http://ncrunnerdude.blogspot.com/ Link to the best running blog there is......

My Body

Everything changed the day I understood that if I was to become a runner, I would have to run with the body I had.

John Bingham, The Courage to Start

I got this quote this morning and I need to resemble that remark. I am always wanting a body I will never have.

I am never going to be taller. At 39 years old, I don't think my legs are going to grow. I could loose weight, but as you have read in earlier post, I love to eat. I like eating what I want to. I hate restrictions. I could do alot of things to get the body that I envy on other people all the time. But this is the body God gave me and I am going learn to love it.

Plus, I am running a marathon in a few short weeks, with this body.... I better get happy with it soon!

Half Marathon PR for me

As you know,I have been nursing a sore foot this week. I have spent several hours at Off N Running working with John and Emily on new shoes and some other ideas. Had not made a true decision on should I run today or not until yesterday. I had not ran all week on the foot, but I did do spin class to keep me moving. I met Jessica on Friday to run 4 miles and see how the new shoes felt. Foot felt fine so I decided to run the Cannonball Half Marathon in Greensboro, NC today.

I laid all my stuff out last night,as to be prepared this morning when the alarm went off. 6 a.m on Saturday comes early but I should be use to it I know. We made it to the race sight on time, despite Mr.Vanities need to be pretty before we leave. I get my chip,use the potty and we are off. We didn't realize they moved the start line so a little sprint was in order to get there. Got there and in plenty of time. Gun went off and we are Off N Running.

Anyone who has ever run with me knows that I am going to do several things throughout the run no matter what the distance. First I am going to complain and secondly, I am going to talk to random people. Third your going to have to hear about all the people I know that are running as well, but just because I am shocked by the number of people I know that run. Today was no different except I might of started complaining a little early. It was cold. Jessica expects it and just tells me to shut up and run.

That is exactly what we did. I had a goal to just finish before today. Then when I was getting ready, my wonderful hubby says "I see the clock for you today". I asked for it not to say 3 hours. He laughed at me and said, "nope it says 2:08", to which I laugh loudly. I am a 10:30 min. miler....and very comfortable at that. Jessica said we were finishing in 2:10 and I told her to leave me if she had to. No need for any of that. Great run for us today and Whiny Spice finished in 2:07:52.

I took 15 minutes off my last half and 8 minutes off the one before that. The good Lord willing OBX will not be as hard for me as I had in mind.

update....

No bad news on the foot. He was actually more worried about the blister. Nothing on the xray except old issues. He said to take the week to cross train, get new shoes and ditch those expensive inserts his office made for me......

I am doing a happy dance......

Not the dayoff I had hoped for.....

Today was supposed to be a day of "ME"....Not doing anything related to my family (ok I will feed them later), my job or my house. It was going to be a rest day and a very well deserved one after my run yesterday. Well laid plans don't always turn out so well laid.

I am how many days away from the OBX Marathon? Can you say 26! I can, 26 days out and I am feeling good and very encouraged that I can do this. I can run 26.2 miles and cross a finish line. My body and my mind are on two different planets. My mind says yes, my body says, "you fool,what are you getting us into"? I must be the proud owner of 100 year old feet. Because they HURT!

With that being said, I am off to the Dr. about my darn foot. Not the right foot that I hurt last year but the left foot that I have now hurt. I have a huge blister that no matter what I do for it, will not heal. Therefore I have been landing on the outside of my foot for so long I have done something! I am praying he says "your a big baby now go get it done" and "oh by the way this will heal the blister"! I want to talk about my orthodics as well. I think they maybe part of the problem. So we will see.

Lucky for me I have the mileage base to FINISH but that will be it. I will be very happy with a finish! Then I promise to never put my body through this again. I will stick to short runs! Yeah whatever...... Can you buy feet on the internet?

Quote of the day!

I always run alone, away from phones and stress. Running is a major part of my life because it keeps me sane. Michael Roux, Jr., Executive Chef, Le Gavroche, London

This was yesterdays Runners World quote of the day. I can relate only in one way. That I run to keep me sane. I am not sure that it is working, but hey, it is better than the alternative. We all know I hate to run alone. Who would I talk to? I think someone would call 911 if they saw me for miles talking to myself, I just don't like it. See it isn't working.... I AM CRAZY!

I hear a friend I work with say quite often, "when do you find the time to run, I am so busy". "I am busy too,but if it is something you need or want you find the time", is my canned answer back to her. The point to this is we all run or do something that we like just for US. I run for no other reason than it helps bring me back to me. In those busy lives, we loose who we are. We become what everyone else wants us to be.

So thank you running for helping me stay somewhat sane and for giving me the time to be who I was meant to be, ME!

I Did It!!!!!!!!!!

This past Saturday I had a 13 miler on my schedule. I wasn't totally dreading it because I knew I had 11 miles that I would be running with Christine and Kay. I can run 2 miles by myself. Not a problem....Wish in my mind it seemed that easy, but I hate running alone as I have stated in previous post.

As we finished the 11 I was already feeling the gloom of being alone. I was going to bring my Ipod to help me,but my daughter had it and forgot she let a friend use it at lunch on Friday. So I thought I will just get my phone and play the music from it as I ran....I had a plan


I am happy to report I didn't need a plan. I should of trusted myself that I could run 2 miles by myself. When we finished out the 11 miles, I told them I was just going to keep going! I felt good and didn't want to ruin that. I ran my 2 miles and it didn't take all day. Actually I did a great job of staying paced thanks to my trusty Scotty watch (aka Forerunner 305)!

Not sure what my plan is for the weekend but I can do this! Or at least that is what I am going to continue to tell myself!

36 Days and Counting

I just pulled up the website for the OBX Marathon and it claims I only have 36 days left for my first marathon. I knew it was coming soon but when you put it like that, I think it is time to worry. My question is, "Am I prepared"?

I have been sitting here for the last hour searching websites on fueling for that mileage. This past weekend I ran a 30K and totally ran out of gas! So now I am super worried about how will I make it for 26.2 miles if I can't run 18.6 miles without running out of steam. My search will continue since I haven't found anything as of yet. I have completed most of my workouts and have felt good about it. I have been sick for a while and finally went to the Dr. I should of gone 2 weeks ago but I would begin to feel better and then it would rear its ugly head again. So with all the medicine I have that should not be a problem anymore.

I think my biggest fear now is that I am on the upside of my mileage, all of my training partners are on different schedules and I will be left alone to run. I hate, hate, hate, let me say it again, hate to run by myself and that is exactly what I will be doing the next couple of weeks. Thank goodness it will only be a few miles by myself, but still. I am codependent when it comes to running. I need someone with me. Yes I need someone to talk to. If any of you want to come join me at odd times on Saturdays for a couple of miles, please email me.

I am putting it out there... I AM SCARED. I am scared of eating poorly and not fueling for the mileage and I am afraid of running alone! I know your saying, Amy you wimp! That is me, a big baby chicken!

VA Beach Rock N Roll Half Marathon

September 6th I ran the VA Beach Rock N Roll Half Marathon with some of my great friends. We had set out to train together but schedules were different so we did most of it on our own and just met in VA Beach for the race. We all had goals and most met them, of course, not me! LOL! I was sick and this really wasn't a priority race for me so I did the best I could for that day and will be happy with it. It was fun to be with friends and that is all that matters. I am trying to remember that life is about experiences made and shared with those we love, not the race clock!

In case your wondering about the Rock 'n' Roll race series. I will never do one of their races again. I thought it cost too much for the poorly organized race that it was. I mean all the hype about bands all along the way and the crowd support. Well how about you failed to mention the cow or horse crap smell we had to endure for about oh 3 miles it seemed like. Ok not really but it was a long time! The no show bands and the long strecht of no music or the music we could barely hear while running. Race directors get your crowd support into that race. We shouldn't have to do the cheering for them. Have your cheerleaders scream something other than "We are proud of you, say we are proud of you"! Mix your sport drink properly so that we might actually be able to drink it...... They are really not going to like my race survey and I never fill those things out! I did this time. I won't even mention the lame tech shirt that we got! You know I only race for the shirt! I need a wardrobe! But again, this was not a priority race which we all know is set for November 8th! OBX Marathon training continues. 54 days and counting!

I think I almost forgot how much time it takes to train for a marathon. How quickly we forget the things that are at times painful and then I act shocked that I didn't remember. I have also forgotten what it is like to sleep past 5 a.m. But deep down, I think I enjoy it and I know one day my body is going to thank me for it! BUT WHEN?

This weekend my long run is 17 miles! Thank God I have other crazy friends to knock this out with or I am sure I would be a lazy couch potato....So crazy friends, THANKS! If you have nothing else better to do, we are meeting at the tennis courts at 6 a.m....... Come join us! An invitation I know none of you will want to turn down.

Not Training Related

I sent my baby to high school this morning. I am sure that the emotion she felt was way different than what I felt. I cannot speak for her feelings, but I was feeling that this is just one more stop in the road of her reaching adulthood and leaving the nest. Being Ally's mom, this is a hard realization. She has always been the child that wanted to be held and loved on. I am just very thankful that she still lets me crawl in bed, cuddle her and kiss her tons! I am sure all of this will be ending but I hope not.

Most of last night and this morning was spent praying for her, her friends, her teachers and the people God will put in her path. I read a book a few years ago "The Power of a Praying Parent". That was one of the best books on parenting I have ever read. The things I didn't even think to pray about. Be assured Ally and Jordan have been covered in pray thanks to this book. There is nothing mom and dads that you can't pray for now for their futures. I promise to not give you a sermon, but we all know this little thing about just because your prayer wasn't answered the way you wanted it to be, doesn't mean it wasn't answered. I use to be the one who would keep praying thinking the outcome would be different. Then I learned to pray and let it go. It was heard...I just had to be prepared for the answer no matter what it was.

Back to today, I asked her if I could follow her into school like I did when she was in kindergarten and she said "NO WAY"! I guess I was lucky to get this one.

I hope and pray that all of you who read who have children that they had a great first day.

I miss blogging

Hello blog world..... It has been a long time. This feels like a reunion! I haven't been blogging but I have missed it. So with that said, I have decided that I was going to start it up again.

Since we last talked, nothing much is new in my life. Well lots of things are new and I will share them with you all and I will try to keep it short. I know your shaking your head saying "yeah right Amy, this is you"!

OK here we go. I have completed 4 other sprint triathlons. My swim continues to improve but boy I have a long way to go. I am learning that it is not about everyone else, it is about me. Race myself and stop worrying what the girl or guy next to me is doing. If I improve from race to race that is all that matters. How many people wish they could do do three sports, one right after the other until you cross the finish line. Well I can....so that is all that should matter except for improvement.

I am training again for a marathon. So I have tried to focus on running and cross training. I need to keep the other two sports up so that my hopes of an international length triathlon doesn't go to the back burner because I want to complete a marathon. The running is going good. I am aware once again of my limitations and not pushing them to avoid injury. My coach helps with! She is constantly reeling me in....LOL! Poor Suzanne. I have to be one of the most diffecult clients that she has due to the fact I am a "self coacher" as well. In a few weeks I am heading to Virgina Beach for the Rock and Roll Half Marathon with Jess, Kevin, Jill and John. Now all of us but John have trained so I can't wait to see the outcome and if he finishes before me. Don't be suprised if he comes up missing because I am likely to take him out to the ocean and drown him if he does happen to finish before me. I am just kidding, but that would be par for the course.

We have had alot of "life" happenings lately. I hope that most people know this but let me remind you if you have forgotten. We are not promised that life is going to ever be easy. I don't care how hard you work, how good you think you are or all the good things you do for others. You are guarenteed to be tossed a struggle or two. It is how we handle those struggles and what we learn from it that matters. In March, John and I were told by my oldest daughter that she was pregnant. Of course I wanted to give her the same speaches over and over but I saved those and just ran them through my own head. She had decisions to make that I would not ever, ever had wished for her to have to make at such a young age. She has been thrust into the grown up world very quickly. All I could say as a parent is that I would love her through whatever she decided and we would look to our faith to pull us through. God has provided greatly! Jordan and Adam have decided upon adoption and I have never felt such at ease about decision in my life. I just hope and pray her heart heals quickly knowing that God brought the perfect family for this miracle of life. But as a mother, I am not sure how long that healing process will take. I can once again, just love her through the decision and hope she will accept the love! Jordan is the child that a mother wants to shake and say wake up, let the people around you love you and ask for help if you need it. Oh well, I could write a book on this one. I just pray and ask that my praying friends keep her the adoptive family in your prayers as well. I guess the next biggest event, is that Ally starts High School on Tuesday. Boy were has the time gone. We just looked at pictures of her starting kindergarten the other day. John told her he was going to walk her into high school and take her picture as well. She wasn't buying that idea at all. Time flies by when your having fun doesn't it.

Well I have given you a short and quick run down of what is happening with me not that any of you cared (just kidding), but this has ended up as an outlet for my sanity since the conception of the blog. Sometimes it just helps to pound it out....

Stay tuned.... I am back! Have a great day!

Interpretation

I know I said I wasn't blogging anymore but I just had to share this. If you feel wronged, ever, you should look into it. I may turn out in your favor.

For those of you that read my "race report" you know how excited I was! You know that it took alot for me to get to that point. More mental than physical, I think. After a friendly phone call to tell me my time wasn't posted and that I was subsequently found on a DQ list, you can only imagine the devastation I felt. How could that be? Did they know how hard I worked, did they remember saying I could wear it? Obviously not. The joy of finishing my first triathlon had been stripped from me. The rug pulled right out from under me, the air in my balloon deflated...you get the picture....I will tell you devastation doesn't begin to describe it. I think I was close to a nervous breakdown. Jill wanted to come and take all sharp objects and drugs from my home. I kept saying to myself, if I had known that was what I worked so hard for, hell I would of saved myself 15 minutes into that stupid lake swim. I was mad! Mad at USAT, Set-Up events, but most of all I was mad at MYSELF! What was I thinking? I knew I wasn't ready for that swim. Humiliation would also be what I was feeling. I wanted someone to know it as well!

So me being me, I write a letter. I send this letter to anyone who will listen. Thinking all the while, it won't make a difference but it will sure as heck make me feel better to tell them how hard I worked for them to strip me of my pride and accomplishments! Not really happy or satisfied with the responses I got, I decide to go one level higher (just because at this point it is a mission of mine). I email USAT. I pay for the membership and I want them to know what I think of their rule and can't there be a better way! Yeah I know, not the girl you want to make mad! I will either boycott you or write you a letter! Nike, CVS and numerous restaurants have felt the wrath before and I am sure there will be others. Childish you might think but people should stand up more often and be heard! Ok back to the point...... I sent a letter to USAT. I got a response back today......"Hello Amy,congratulations on overcoming your fear and completing the White Lake Triathlon. If water temperature was 79.2, you should not have been disqualified. Our procedure, which must have been bypassed, is to change the wetsuit wearing competitor out of age group division and into a "wetsuit" division and let them race. Disqualification is not correct". Charlie at USAT then proceeds to send me my times and tells me that there is a USAT Penalty sheet that does say Disqualified but that must be for administration purposes. Great Charlie! My joy is returning. But what about the other people who might have felt this way on Monday morning when their friends called them? Like I have said to a couple of people, after I was cited some rules for USAT, my other friends and family don't understand rules, they understand that something I worked hard for, didn't happen. They know out beside bib no. 178 is a big fat DQ.

So friends and family, I was not DQ'd. I did finish, I did get a time and I wasn't last! My friend Chuck told me it really didn't matter what the stupid computer said, I know that I finished and I know how hard I worked and Chuck you are absolutely correct. Except today, I don't feel like it was all for nothing. I had even put my White Lake Shirt away vowing to never wear it since I was DQ'd. Well I will wear that shirt proudly every chance I get! I have this thing about wearing shirts if you didn't complete the race.

The point again is, if you feel wronged, and I felt way wronged, please question it. This may not of turned out in my favor and I was fully prepared for that since the joy was gone anyway, but it did! It turned out someone else's interpretation was wrong.

Ambition or Stupidity - not sure which

Obviously, you all know that I am not blogging anymore. I did want to share the last one with you though. I feel like you all have traveled the journey with me and I owed it to you to tell you about it.

Recap, you know I have been training for a triathlon. As well, you know that I just learned to swim. If that is what you want to call what I do. LOL! If you can't laugh at yourself, who can you laugh at? I am well aware of my limitations. Swimming is definitely one of them. But I get up three days a week and go to the pool and punish myself. I did go through a time that I hated the swim portion so badly that I didn't train like I should have but have learned, it is not like cramming for a test. Lesson learned, got it train, train, and more train! Moving along....

When I started this idea, I registered for the White Lake Sprint II. I needed a goal. So I waited for registration to open and sat by the computer and got John and I in. We trained hard together and had a ton of fun doing it most days. 4 months later and here we are. Bags packed and we are headed to White Lake. Nerves are in check. I spent plenty of days during the week panic stricken. Sunday is creeping up on us. I watch the Half Ironman on Saturday and am in awe of the athletes. The day is hot and windy and they did it! It will definitely take a year of training for that. Saturday night is upon us and we all go out for a good dinner and lots of salt! I have never seen so much salt used at one table, ever. A good nights sleep under my belt and John and I are off. We park, we pump tires or so we think.... someone thought they put air in my tires when really they took care of their own bike and forgot all about mine. It was fine, they had a tent set-up for these types of things. Transition area set up and ready. Then they call the water temperature. Too warm to be wetsuit legal. DREAD! That is the only thing I can call it. I make the decision based on the fact I am not going to win any awards or points for this race. I just want to finish. Whatever that means in the USAT world, I am wearing my wetsuit. I am surrounded by people who have trained with me, loved me, and coached me! They are encouraging and all the while I am sure they are worried. Cause, I am....... I get in the water to warm up and I feel great. I get in the line (in water start) and my goggle strap breaks! I feel a little panic welling up but Jenn Harris calms me. The countdown is over and we are swimming. Slow steady strokes is what I tell myself, well bamb, I get kicked in the head. Bamb, someone runs into me.... I don't have to tell you what happened next. PANIC sets in and it doesn't leave. There were plenty of times (too many to count) when I said to myself just quit, you can't do this. For every time I said that, I heard my husband in my head telling me I could do it, I heard my coach Suzanne Duncan telling me I could do it, I heard Jamie O'Sullivan telling me I could do it, I heard Marisa Pirih telling me I could do it, Pam and John Connor telling me I could do it, my friend Jill telling me I could it, Christina telling me I could do it. Then I heard the man in the kayak ask me what my name was. He told me "Amy you can do it, if you get past the first buoy, your home free, it gets easier". I think I told him I didn't know if I could get to that first buoy. He told me I could. He said I looked strong. HE LIED! But I am glad he did. Then my husband swims up to me or near me I should say and offers to give up his race to stay with me. He didn't want to leave me out there. I cry as I type that! Because he had a special reason for racing yesterday. It was for his mom. Whom most of you know passed away a couple of weeks ago. I couldn't do that to him! I wanted him to go, if it meant leaving me in water that I felt like at times would swallow me up. You know your in trouble when the men in the rescue boat are standing up watching you and asking if your ok, waiting to jump in and save you! "Boys, I got it, it may not look like it or feel like it but I got it, Thanks". I am positive God placed angels in that water to help me. I round the second buoy and then there is the orange blow up man swishing in the wind.... I can do this, I can do this... who cares if I am last! I wasn't but almost! I get out of the water and of course I am mad at myself... but I remember what my coach said, there is no finish line at the swim exit. So I get started on pulling that wetsuit off and I run. Smiling that guess what, I got out of that damn lake and I can now move on to something I can do, ride my bike. Damian did not let me down. My friend Jill, Christina and I have named our bikes.... Damian, Lucifer and Delores. Jill is not as fond of her bike yet and Christina is just such a happy go lucky person we named hers a happy name! I get started on the bike and I say to myself, the swim is over, forgotten, just ride. I do just that, I passed plenty of people that I know got out of the water before me and that made me smile. I came on a kid that had 14 on his leg and I yell out,"hey kid, it is mother's day, let me pass you!" Look you do what you can...don't worry he caught me. 14 miles later, I am ready to run. I rack my bike, get my shoes on, water bottle in hand, because I drank no water during the bike ride because I lost my water bottle. Road was rough in some spots. So I know I need to drink, I dehydrate easily. I get started on legs that feel like they weigh 400 lbs. I tried eating some sport beans as well, couldn't open them and run with a bottle. Yes I walked. Got my beans in and started again. Then mother nature took over and I need the bathroom. I swore I was not going to stop to use the bathroom during the race. Lots of lessons learned for the next race. So I added a few minutes there. I wanted to stay at 30 minutes but oh well....but you know I didn't know how long I had been out there, I didn't wear a watch on purpose. My goal was to finish this race and I did!

When I came down the finishing stretch and all my friends where there with my husband and I heard them screaming my name, I knew I had arrived. It just didn't matter how long it took me in that lake. It didn't matter how long it took me on the bike or to run. I had FINISHED something I didn't ever think I could. In this lifetime I never thought I would get in a lake and swim. I have plenty of friends who can attest to this. I overcame a fear that has plagued me since I was a very young child. I DID IT! I cried! I have never felt anything like that before.

I have so many people to thank that I don't even know where to begin...You know who you are and you know what you mean to me..... THANKS will never be enough. I hope that I can be as supportive to you when you need it like you have been to me.

Signing off blog world!

Sometimes training can be boring.....

I only mean that I don't have any fantastic revelations to write about. I swim (ok I actually have to do it more often), I bike and I run...... I have great friends who are with me. The bestest friend ever is by my side daily pushing me to be the best I can be. If it weren't for my husband I might slide on a few workouts. I really should thank him instead of nagging at him for staying on my back. Then there is my Suzanne. She has to constantly reassure me that it is all good and I can do this! I think she realy has a little bag of hats that she wears with me. Coach, friend, counselor...... I am sure there are more, but she is great!

Although I love, love, love snow, I am looking forward to sunshine and warmth for bike rides outside and running through the greenscapes of the parks instead of the dreary brownscapes we have now. Although, I noticed my eyes are burning. Time to call the Dr. for some eye drops. That is the part I hate the most about Spring. Other than that, I need to get my butt in gear and focus on weight loss and overall strenght and endurance. Funny how last year I felt like a strong runner (for me) and now some days I feel like I am barely going to make it. But last year I couldn't swim or ride a bike so I guess you give up some of that strenght to share with the other sports.

Here is hoping for something exciting to write about soon.

Not much different in the training world going on

I know I haven't written since the snow but not alot going on any different than you are use to hearing about. However, today, in the cold and rain we are getting ready to go run the Beer Run 09 to support Special Olympics.

I am not a fan of running in the rain or the cold, but hey at the end there is beer. I love cold beer at the end of a run....So off to get ready.....

Hopefully there will be pictures of this to post. Stay dry and warm and be thinking of all of crazy runners out there today.

I love snow

Today we woke up to a winter wonderland here in the central part of NC. I had to share a photo or two with you.

I turn into a kid when they call for snow. Of course we went to the grocery store for the essentials. I sat on the couch and waited all day long. Then when it started I was up and down looking at it to make sure it hadn't stopped and that is was sticking. I made my usual phone call to my dad to see what it was doing at his house. This is a family tradition so to speak. My grandmother called everyone no matter what time to tell you the first flake had fallen. No need for sitting by a window then, she was always happy to be on weather duty. This is absolutely the most beautiful sight I think there is. So that meant not much sleep because I thought if I closed my eyes it would stop. Well the snow continued and blanketed the ground and streets.

I hope that if you have to get out in it, you will be safe!

Overcoming Fear

My fear of water is really beginning to hinder my progress. Today I had Masters Swim again and what I am finding is that the anxiety of going is taking a toll on me. I am nervous, I am aggitated and can be down right mean I guess. Just ask John.

I have been trying to tell myself to relax that I am not going to drown, there are plenty of people and a life guard if something does go wrong, just breath! Yes that simple, just breath! No, not so simple for someone who at the age of 39 is trying to overcome a life long fear of water. Why won't it go away? What in my head stops me when I seem to be making progress? I just want to cry! I want to sit on the side of the pool like a baby and cry because the fear is screaming at me while I am trying.

I watch all these other people gliding through the water with ease and then there is me. I want to be that person gliding. I want to swim all the yardage she sets out on her little dry erase board and then the FEAR stops me again!

I am not quiting! I will beat this somehow. I just don't know how, but I am! I am going to try and find a book today at lunch. I am assuming the self help section will have plenty. I can't believe I am reduced to a self help book!

Sometimes it is just not your day!

Today was the second of my third indoor tri. I have followed the training and up until yesterday thought I would be well prepared for it. I did go off my schedule a tad bit, I ran 8 miles yesterday and it was supposed to be an off day. OK I varied the schedule alot. I just really had missed running with my group on Saturdays and thought I would go and only do a mile or two. Well 8 later and I was finished. The rest of the day I rested did that count? I had dinner last night with my most of my running group and thought I got to bed early. Yeah you can go to bed but unless you go to sleep it really doesn't help. John told Ally she could have friends come over. You know the rest. At 4:30 a.m. I finally closed my eyes. I could of strangled all those girls.

To put it nicely, I SUCKED it up good today. I can't tell you where the breakdown happened but it did. It is over, I got my finishers slip and I am just chalking it up a too good workout and move on.

She is here

The long awaited birth of my newest running partner is here. Evelyn Marie McKnight was born 02-20-09 at 1:03 a.m. Weighing in at 9 lbs 8oz.

Mom, dad and baby doing well. You can see more pictures by clicking on the link to the right, Baby to be.

Waiting to meet my new running partner

Today is the day that I am supposed to get a new a running buddy. Sorry old running buddies, nothing against you but I have been waiting 9 months for this one. Yes my friend Jessica aka favorite running buddy (because she was the first) is having a baby. I lost Jessica this past season due to pregnancy and I am so ready for her to have little ladybug as we have affectionately called her for the last oh I don't know 5months so we can run in the mornings again. Jessica is at the hospital and has been all day waiting to deliver. So hurry up already! Ha ha easy for me to say I am sitting at a computer!

Once I have pictures I will post them. I am so excited mainly due to the fact I get my morning running buddy back and we are adding one. Now we just need to get Rod and his double jog stroller with us and watch out Adams Farm the stroller runners are coming! I think I will have to learn to push a jog stroller, yeah just not up that hill that we hate so much. I want to that woman that runs by everyone pushing the stroller like it is nothing even if it isn't my baby! Yes I know I am dreaming.......

Update to come with pictures later.

So hard to eat properly!

In training the two hardest things for me are strenght training and eating properly. Strength training mainly because I hate it. Worse than the treadmill I hate it! I know I need it and it will help me in the long run but getting me to actually do it is like pulling teeth! The other and probably the most important is nutrition. I like food and food likes me. We definitely have a love hate relationship. I hate that I love food so much!

Today of course on my workout schedule is what, yes strenght training. I am going to try to do it. I say try lightly only because I have been sick and I still just don't feel well. So that is my excuse and I am sticking to it! If I feel better as the day goes on, yes I will go after work and do it. I PROMISE!

Nutrition is another subject. Suzanne is trying to help me with this but when she says I can't have the second pack of chicken nuggets it just makes me not like her very much! I am hungry,I need it, I want it! I really do love to eat. I always have! So therefore I have always struggled to be this size! Not a size I would like to be and I have lost 40lbs since I started running but I am stuck. So time to listen to someone on how to eat correctly. Don't anyone start sending me diet information, I will block you from my email! Just kidding. I guess this is really going to be more of an advertisement than anything though. I was introduced to these fabulous breakfast cookies by Erin Baker's. OMG... They are delicious. They have a website www.bbcookies.com that you can check out their other products. The brownies are great as well. You can go by Off N Running and they sell the breakfast cookies there. Emily will be more than happy to help you with cookies or anything else you might be looking for. I just ordered my next batch from them. I have seen that this helps me eat breakfast as I tend to skip this meal alot and let coffee be my main source of nutrition in the morning. Yes I know breakfast is the most important meal of the day. So thanks to Erin Baker's and their cookies, I am getting a good start. My favorite flavor so far is Morning Glory! Hard to describe but it has fruits and nuts in it and it is absolutely wonderful. I just finished Gingerbread which is a seasonal flavor but it is also good, but so it Chocolate Chunk (Vegan), Banana Nut, Pumpkin Spice ok they are all good. Told you I like food!

I am really going to work on strength training and eating better. Wish me luck!

We have had this conversation before!

My body and I have this same conversation several times a year. I don't have time to be sick and hurting. I have been sick this past week but I was feeling a little better until this morning. Yes today was Masters Swim. I thought I would give it a try and I did. Not much of one once I learned you can't breath very well underwater with a stuffy nose and clogged up lungs! Justine was kind enough to let me just do kickboard work. I also did some streamline backstroke, very well I might add. If nothing else, I can float! However, my legs were already tight from Sunday and Monday's workout. Now my legs are so stiff they hurt!

I am supposed to run with my girls tonight. Which I am so looking forward to since I haven't been able to run during the week with them. I have missed them and today is my first night back with them in a long time. I hope someone in the group will be nice enough to run slow with me. I don't think the legs are gonna let me do any kind of pace worth talking about. I am really wondering if the legs are going to let me run at all. This is one of those game time decisions! So Kay be looking for a last minute text from me.

On top of all this I have my second indoor tri on Sunday. The conversation I referred to in the title is the one I have with my body often about me not having time for all this sickness and pain. Suck it up and move on!

St. Valentine Massacre

Today was the St. Valentine Massacre Marathon Relay that is held at Country Park. This is my second year running it and after it is over my body always ask why we do it. My legs are killing me right now. My face got sunburned, yes in February you can get a tan here in North Carolina and tonight they are calling for possible icy conditions. Crazy I know.

Team ALEVE (how appropriate) consisted of John and Pam Connor, me and my friend Richard Needham. Richard is an excellent runner, way better than I would ever dream of being so I feel bad for him that he was on a team with me. John and Pam are just as good so the three of them did great. I will admit I was going to back out as late as yesterday because I have had a cold this week and just didn't feel good. But this morning I woke feeling ok and thought what the heck... Yeah what the heck you can't breath without wheezing but you should be able to run really fast for 1.6 miles, then you get a rest. No problem...... Well it wasn't much a problem thanks to Marisa's mom and the use of her inhaler. Yes the asmatic leaves home without her inhaler. What in the world was I thinking. Obviously not thinking. But two puffs and I was good to go for 3 more rounds. John went with me and was going to run if needed but he ended up on a team with our friend Christine Flowe and he had a blast. I am glad! Because all I heard for the three days is I wish I were on a team. So thank goodness the boy got his team.

If you have never run a marathon relay, I would suggest doing it one time. It is a blast! Of course the hardest part is cooling down just to have to turn around and do it again, but if you are like me, you are so busy visiting with people that your time goes by so fast you don't even notice it. The part I like the best is seeing people you know and watching them do great as well. The team I was on last year is really glad they dumped me and got new members. They kicked butt! Great job to Chuck, Carrie, Brian and Trish.

I am already looking forward to this race next year. Why I am not sure, I guess I enjoy the pain.

A birthday gift to love

OK I am not that into my birthday. Growing up it was just another day. No big deal made by anyone, we did get to pick the kind of cake we wanted and what we wanted for dinner. My grandmother could make the best cakes in the world. LEMON POUNDCAKE was mine and my brothers pick every time. Well except for the time I got a barbie cake. Not sure what that was about since I hated barbies. A birthday to me just means that I am one year older and one year closer to being what my kids call old. But this year I am not worried about being older at all. I don't feel like a 39 year old woman nor do I think I look 39. Not sure how you are supposed to feel or look at my age but I am happy and that is all that matters.

When it comes to holidays John normally is not a planner. He does his shopping for every holiday the day before. So this year when he told me he knew what he wanted to get me for my birthday I was surprised. My answer is always, don't buy me clothes I want to loose some weight first. Instead we end up at the bike shop looking at tri bikes. OK we are just looking I thought. I talked to Amy at Paceline about women's tri bikes but didn't really think much about it except for the fact that is what I wanted. Well guess what... he got me the bike. It had to be ordered so I don't actually have it yet but it is on it's way. Hopefully by Saturday it will be here and I can get fitted. Thank you John, Jordan and Ally for a birthday present I wanted and will love I just know it!

I am so excited to ride it but I am also dreading learning something new. Aren't I in the process of learning enough (swimming)? I guess it goes to show, you are never to old to learn new tricks!

Masters Swim - I should of thought twice on this one

Today was my first Masters Swim class. Yeah I really didn't know what I was getting into. I wonder if I can stop payment on my check!

The class is twice a week 6 a.m. to 7 a.m. I have a problem getting up that early, but nothing I can't work on. I get up, I am ready to go and we are on time. Of course there are people already out in the pool swimming, warming up, but they are great swimmers and not like me SCARED!

Our instructor Justine, she just really didn't seem to care that this was my first time and that I was new to swimming. OK that was harsh she was very nice to me. I am just frustrated with this whole swim thing so therefore I am going to think everyone is out to get me on it. I feel like everyone is laughing and I know they aren't because the guys this morning were so nice to me and encouraging (Thanks Bob and Jeff)! I was ready to quit and not come back. They convinced me to keep at it. So that is what I will do! Melissa, I am gonna need my "No More Excuses" necklace back for a while please.....

I need to just suck this up that I can't do it right now but one day it will come and stop the baby crying about it..... OK when I stop crying (literally) I will let you all know......

I am a TRIATHLETE!

As you know I have been doing a 10 week triathlon training program. Today's indoor triathlon is the goal that we working towards. I made it here and now I can't wait to share the experience of my first indoor triathlon with my groupies.

An indoor triathlon consist of a 10 min. swim, a 20 min bike and 20 min run. Of course your on a stationary bike and a treadmill (aka dreadmill). This morning we get up and go to the Spears Y in Greensboro and get ready to participate in an event that to some may seem like a breeze but to me was a test of what I could push my body to do. Granted the time is not that long and your probably thinking well it is only a 10 min swim , a 20 min bike and a 20 min run. Well KUDOS to you for thinking how simple it is,you should of joined us. John and I had separate times so that I didn't feel the need to compete with him. He went at 10 and I was at 10:30. We volunteer up until time to go and warm up in the pool. I am in the pool ready to warm up and I am trying to relax and find my inner peace with the water. I thought I had it. I felt good. I slept good last night and I ate good this morning. Everything I thought I was supposed to do. I feel well trained! Then I look down at a guy that goes to our Y and he and his wife are talking and she nods toward me and he says to her "don't worry I have seen her swim"! Can you believe the nerve! I can't and me being me, I let it get to me! So time to start and I get my first 50 meters in and then I don't know what happened. Well I do, I forgot to breath and then I went a couple more strokes and my heart rate was so high, I just panicked! If you know anything about panicking in the water it is not a nice feeling at all. I flipped over to back stroke so that I could catch my breath and well I never caught it. I never found that inner peace with the water. So to say the least I backed stroked 250 meters.... I wanted to cry. I was humiliated at the fact that I forgot all that I learned and that I couldn't swim! Oh well. Thank God Suzanne was there to remind me that the swim part was over and that I was moving on to two sports that I am stronger at. "Turn that frown upside down", she says "and go ride that bike!" I go and ride that bike! I get off the bike, my legs feeling like limp noodles, change my shoes and I go to the treadmill. I run! I am running at a good pace for me and here comes you know who that says "this is your last 90 seconds, is that as fast as you can go"? Well no it isn't... So I push it up to 7.9 on the treadmill and I run for 90 seconds.... Ok beside the fact that my lungs felt like they would explode, I was finished with my first triathlon. I am a triathlete! That just sounds so weird to say but I am darn proud of it. Out of 24 women I came in 16th.

Of course most of my training group was there and the support you get from everyone is priceless. Biggest Kudos goes out to my friends John and Pam who raced today and they both have been sick. They did great and I am proud of them. I am proud of everyone but the three of us, just learned to swim together, were the rest of the group already knew how and just needed to get faster. Which they did. Great job Triad Tri Team and thanks to everyone for your support and encouragement.

In two weeks, I turn around and do this again!

Could I please get a good nights sleep?

I am so tired today..... The last couple of nights I have not slept good at all. I don't know why, but I wake up about 2 a.m. and I am wide awake unitl about 4:30 - 5:00 a.m. I have thought today about all the reasons I am awake. I wonder if being the mother to a 17 year old girl has anything to do with it or that handsome fellow named Henry (the cat) that has to be as close to me as he possibly can. Those two might be reason. I am thinking the first one is it.

To say the least, I missed my Master's Swim this morning. Something has to change and quick because I really need this class. We had our last swim clinic last night so this was taking it's place in my training

I am going to bed early tonight! Hopefully sleep will come quickly!

I think she wants to fire me!

Hello blogworld. Yes it has been a few days. Don't you just hate that I have nothing to write about? Yeah I know not really. Just seems fun in my mind to think you missed me.

Well here it is the first time mentioned for the world to know. I have hired a Triathlon Coach. Suzanne Duncan gets the great honor of coaching me to my first Half-Ironman in 2010! Yes you read right, Half Ironman. For my other coach friends oh please don't feel bad, I think I spared you! After my first scolding by email I think she wishes I would of picked another coach and is wondering can she fire me. Poor poor Suzanne! I failed to mention I was a control freak.... small detail

I know, I like to think and train big don't I? I have had so much fun training for the indoor tri that I just thought what the heck. You only live once and God only gives us one go around at this thing called life. So I am going to make the most of it as long as He will let me.

Swimming has finally begun to kick in. No I am not fast and can't swim as long as other people or as long as I would like, but 10 weeks ago I never thought I would swim at all. 10 weeks ago, I never thought I would consider myself an endurance athlete but I am. I start Master's Swim on Thursday and will be swimming twice a week with that. Boy that sounds like fun. 6a.m to 7 a.m.......... Oh please can you have coffee ready.

Training takes on a new look now. So hopefully the blog will be interesting. I am sure Suzanne will be cursed on here often. She might want to start a blog of her own to complain about her clients. LOL! No I really like her and I think her personality is just what I need to get me going. I need help getting going that is for sure. My husband has to help get me out the door in the mornings. So John, on those mornings I yell NO at you I don't want to get up, just push me out of bed and make me do it.

My new moto is "the difference between possible and impossible is determination"! I have the determination, lets just see if I have the ability.


Have a great week and stay tuned for the recap of Sunday's event.

Nothing really new to report

With nothing exciting to report I just thought I would drop you all a line saying HELLO!

Training is still underway for my first indoor triathlon. Swimming is coming along. Not as fast as I would of hoped but hey I can make it down and back without drowning in the middle somewhere. Of course I am thoroughly disgusted with this but I am going to turn that frown upside down (that was for you Suzanne) and think of it this way, 8 weeks ago, I would of never ever thought I would swim at all. Biking, not a problem... Building strength to get ready to ride with the big boys come spring. Running.... well I love it and am happy I get to continue. I met my group on Saturday and ran 6 miles. It felt great to be running without restrictions. Not that I have done a good job of listening anyway. Time to get some miles in if I am going to run a half marathon in May. That part I am listening to the Dr. on.


Same old stuff I guess..... Happy Tuesday!

Come back only if needed!

I know I said I wouldn't write about my foot anymore but I had to today. I had my follow up with Dr. Bednarz at Greensboro Orthopedics this morning. He RELEASED me to run! Those were joyous words to hear.

Three weeks of physical therapy, lots of cream, anti-inflammatories and new orthotics and I am like new. OK well maybe not new but I am ready. I do have to have an adjustment made to my orthotics but other than that, I should be good to go.

He did put stipulations on what he wanted me to focus on first. I could train for a half marathon this spring and if all went well a full for the fall. He warned me of over training with the triathlons and marathon on my list of things to do this year. Listen to my body and slow down, rest, stop and come back if needed. He also warned that I would suffer foot pain for the rest of my life due to high arches but if I do the stretching and all that I have learned I should be fine. Just to know it will not 100% go away. OH and remember to get the right kind of shoes! VERY IMPORTANT.

Running group, see you on Saturday. Finally I don't have to worry when I run, what will my Dr. think!

My body is screaming stop it!

My body is screaming STOP IT! Well maybe not that loudly but boy this week I am feeling it!

Over the weekend I took it somewhat easy. Saturday when I normally run, I didn't. Call me lazy but it was way cold and I just needed a day off. Sunday was swim clinic. That went great. I am slowwwwwwwwwwly getting better. Not where I need to be but progress is progress. Monday being a holiday and having the day off from work, I made big plans for training. I was going to do spin class and power yoga with my coach Suzanne Duncan (www.suzanneduncan.com) OK well NEVER again will I make plans to do those type of activities with her again... EVER! Maybe never ever is strong but not for a while! I didn't make it to spin class but I did go to power yoga. Yes I loved yoga so much I thought I would give this power thing a try. I think I will stick with just plain yoga. It went very fast and very longgggg.... Today my upper body feels like I got in a fight and someone beat me up with a steel pipe. Literally it hurts that bad. I wanted to stay in bed today so badly. I don't think my boss would appreciate me calling in because I am fat and out of shape! I think the words suck it up have been used before and not just by him.

I am not quitting! I can do this... I am just going to close my eyes take in deep breaths through my nose of course and remind myself I am an athlete and the pain will all be worth it once I cross the finish line!

But until then I am going to complain, cry oh and eat Aleve like it was candy! I probably should make a stock purchase today.I can see the value in Aleve going up.

Transition Time

As you all know, a Triathlon is swim, bike and run. Switching from one sport to the other is called transition. DUHH... I know you all knew that. Well for us newbies seeing what that looked like was important. Suzanne (you know the awesome coach I told you about earlier www.suzanneduncan.com) had a video for us to watch the other night. Of course in this video they have the ELITE atheletes showing us how to do it and giving us tips on making transition times less. Could someone just be at my spot with all my stuff ready to go for me. That is the only way I am gonna save any time.

After watching this video all I can say is I see a broken leg or ankle in my future very soon. Heck maybe even a broken neck. Dr. Bednarz and I are going to be on a first name basis, Blue Cross and Blue Shield will probably cancel our insurance and I will be in a wheelchair. OMG! They got out of the water, ran to their bikes got on their bikes with the shoes already clipped in and they jumped off their bikes with no shoes and ran on pavement. Ouch.... your feet people! What the hell! I am a huge baby and my feet hurt bad enough. I need the skin on the bottom of them. I think??????

Suzanne says she will hold a clinic before White Lake to give us some practice. Oh yeah I am going to need some serious practice. On that day please someone have EMS on standby! If I weren't already scared enough, now I am like ok REFUND! Is there such a thing..... Set-up events, can you please consider refunds to the mentally challenged because somewhere in the process I lost my ability to make cognative decisions. I am sure my doctor will confirm all of this!

The little kids even laugh at me!

I have been struggling with swimming and yes I am not too proud to admit I am having trouble. I want to be good at it but hey I am human and am not gonna be good at all things. With that said, I seek out some one on one help. Our instructor Jessie Dull is a swim instructor at the Y so I asked her to help me. YEAH Jessie! I like working with her because she is very encouraging and I need all the encouragement I can get right now. Jessie competed this past Sunday in the first indoor triathlon and came in 3rd in the women's group. Maybe she can train me in the rest of it as well.

We met last night and of course I was a nervous Nelly! Why I don't know but I was. We start out with some simple stuff. Breathing! That should just come natural right? Well for all of you in blogworld it might but for me, the crazy curly headed blond just isn't happening so naturally. To quote Jessie "you have great kicks and the strokes are good until you go to breath then you drop your arm" or "your kicks are great until you panic then your feet kick really fast". Ok alot of panic happens!

Remember the post where I said don't just stop by my house because I might have my head in a pot of water practicing to breath. Well guess what? Really don't come by unless you would like to witness this happening. Jessie is sending me some instructions on how to get comfortable with breathing and water near my mouth. Oh this should be interesting and hilariously funny!

So we are in the middle of our lesson and the little kids come for their lessons. Can you say 5 year old kids looked better in the water than I did. I swear they were laughing at me. Not to mention their moms sitting on the side staring at me. I am sure they were wondering just what in the heck I was doing. Jessie says not to worry, she is sure those ladies can't swim at all so for me to be glad I am trying. See isn't she good!

I have swim clinic tonight and then work with her again on Friday night. Wish me luck.... I need it!

When we feel the struggles of everyday life

When you think you are struggling with everyday life, just know that someone else has a bigger and deeper struggle out there I am sure.

In the last week while dealing with my own struggles, I have seen two other families experience tragedy that doesn't even come close to what I go through. One family lost their family member and the other came close.

I would ask that you click on the link to a blog I follow and learn a little more about Nicholas. Lisa Richardson, Nicholas' mother is a very dear friend from church. I have sat here this morning crying over how bad I feel for complaining about the struggles I have with my daughter. Nothing compared to what Lisa goes through and I am telling you I have never seen a more shining example of God's love and faithfulness in someone. Lisa is everything I wish I were and more.

Life is precious! Don't take one minute for granted.

Up Dog, Down Dog TIRED DOG

Yesterday was the end to a long and tiring weekend. I need this week to recover. Not happening. Training has kicked into full gear and mental focus is also in full gear.

Saturday morning started out with a short 5 mile run with my group. I chose 5 because my foot had been hurting really bad all week. Weather was great! I so much prefer cold weather running to hot. I know you all won't believe this but I have decided to follow Dr.'s order and only focus on a half marathon for the spring and then a full for the fall. We will see how that works out for me. I have several events lined up for the year but that is another blog topic of course.

Sunday started out early due to our indoor Triathlon series starting. I did not particpate in this one as I am not swimming that well yet. I volunteered instead. Wanted to get an idea of how it worked and what it looked like. Boy was that interesting. John being adventerous particpated though. He did well. I am extremely proud of him. Of course I gave my speach on race yourself. The first time gives you something to work toward and all that..... Did he listen, probably not but I felt better hearing myself give it. So now I know what to expect and what how it flows. That to me is a huge help since I am totally a visual kind of person. After that was over, it was time for a quick lunch then off to the next thing. YOGA FOR ATHELETES at the Y. OK I go on and on about my feet and after being on them for hours they were killing me. I mean pain! I didn't have anything to take either, so I just suffered. We go to Yoga and Suzanne Duncan (our Tri Coach) put my body into all kinds of positions. I thought to myself oh no, I am gonna be so sore afterwards how am I ever gonna swim. Yoga went fine and I honestly want to do more. Because after swimming for an hour and that class besides being dead tired, my body didn't hurt at all. Normally when I get home at night I am taking pills and rubbing anti-inflamatory cream on feet and last night, NOTHING! My feet did not hurt. When the alarm went off this morning I hesitated before putting my feet down because I just knew it was gonna be hard. NOTHING! It was fine. Just like before I started running and got hurt.

Athelets, if you have never done a class like this you should look into it. Check out Suzanne's website. I understand there is a section of upcoming events so I hope she has more YOGA classes. Website is www.suzanneduncan.com or email her at suzanne@suzanneduncan.com. She is an excellent instructor and coach. Very motivational.

Today no pain at all......So far so good! Only thing I am today is one Tired Dog (wonder if that can be a new pose)!

Bike Trainer

Last week I purchased a pre-loved bike trainer from a member of our TTT group. This trainer will allow me to ride my bike inside when it is too cold to go outside. I have plenty of warms clothes to ride outside but finding friends crazy enough to go with me might be the problem. So therefore I am set up in our playroom. The girls have been moved out and the bikes moved in. John couldn't stand it so he bought one to. We can now train together, how sweet is that. Boy that should be very interesting as we both have a competitive streak in us....If you hear stories of him falling off the bike, no I did not push him! Well maybe I did but I am not admitting anything.

I bought this from a guy (Jeff McClintock) who had just finished the Wisconsin Ironman and is running the Houston Marathon next week. So you know I felt stupid asking him to show me how it worked... But he was very kind to not laugh at me. Thanks Jeff! I bought a DVD to help me and keep me focused. Last night I finally tried it out. I got on it and thought no problem. Well I have decided I am going to just stop thinking. This DVD kicked my big butt! I mean 80 minutes of hard spinning. Thank God for 90 second rest. Ally thougth it so funny she took my picture so I thought I would share. I mean the sweat was pouring off of me. I thought I would passout. I had to add Ducky to the blog. She sat and waited for the sweat drops and cleaned up after me. YUCK!

May 10th White Lake Sprint Triathlon

I have offically registered for my first real sprint triathlon. I hate to waste money so therefore I will finish this event if it kills me. I might drown in open water but I will finish one way or the other. They may carry me across the finish line in a body bag and you all can say I died tri'ing!! Keep Praying the body holds up. Cover the feet first.....

I am looking at training plans and have gotten a great start with our indoor series training that we are doing. With a little luck and alot of training I will be well prepared for this event. If any one has ideas on training plans that you would like to share, please do so.

I have vowed to work harder on my diet. I LOVE FOOD AND FOOD LOVES ME. I am normally preparing for the next meal before finishing the one I am on. I am not sure how to stay focused on this without becoming obsessed! I am keeping a log of what I eat as well as how the day went, training and how I slept the night before. I will say if I workout at night, I am not sleeping so well. Too energized I guess. Therefore I am working on dragging myself out of bed in the early a.m. John is so much better at this than I am. So he will have to just start pulling me literally from the thing. Be gentle though, you know my feet hurt when they first hit the ground.

John says to me the other night, I see some traveling in our future. He had a whole list of events he would like to do. Doesn't that sound like fun? I can't wait. But for now, it is White Lake!

Stay tuned.......

I need an update

Not that anyone in blog world is looking for an update, but I know for myself I need one. Yes I am loser and I go back and read these all the time to remember what is happening and if I actually made any progress!

Yes I have made progress. Swimming is coming right along. I am most proud of Pam though. I hope it clicks with me the way it has her. But who would of thought 5 weeks ago I would actually be swimming. NO ONE I AM SURE! This morning we did a brick (cycle/run). Crazy hard on my legs. But when it was over I felt so darn good. I felt energized and ready to go. Nothing extreme, we biked for 40 minutes then we ran for 15 minutes. That is what the schedule called for.

John has his first indoor tri this weekend. I was worried earlier in the week when he fell off of some steps, but after yesterday and seeing him swim then this morning, nope not worried at all. He is going to do great. So Sunday at 10 a.m. if you don't have anything to do come on out to the Ragsdale YMCA and cheer him on!

Well this week I am working on improving my diet. I need to really loose some weight and more importantly body fat! This should be an interesting week. I love food and actually am grouchy when I am hungry! So watch out, you have been warned.

Better late than never

Our computer at home is acting weird so I couldn't write my New Years Resolution in time......

I did alot of thinking and praying into what I wanted to see change in my life this coming year. 2008 was an interesting year and ended greatly! Lots of changes were made and lots of prayer answered. So this year I am giving it another try.

Unlike the normal resolutions, loose weight, stay more active, I have set goals that should effect my life more meaningful. Or at least I hope they do... so going in order of least importance here are my top 5.....

5. Be not so easy to judge others and situations (I hate to admit this but I am a very judgemental person. I don't mean to be and I have no reason to be this way. My life is full of things that could be judged by someone else, as I am sure it is, but I don't want to be that person. At least not on a daily basis. So I am giving this one a go!) Wish me luck.....

4. Watch my language (yes yes I can have potty mouth very badly, especially if I am mad! Which can be often due to the fact I am the mother of a 17 & 13 year old! Need I say anything else. But it is ignorant to use that kind of language and I am going to clean my act up) I want to be a good example to my children and I think this will be a good start.

3. Enjoy things more (I want to enjoy this life more. I don't want things to pass me by without stopping to smell the roses! I am always so hurry hurry busy busy that I don't seem to enjoy my life or certain areas of it enough)

2. Anger (If you don't know me very well than you would have no idea that I can be very quick to anger! Oh yeah it gets ugly sometimes. I am quick to snap! I always joke, at my house we don't have nic naks because if you make me mad enough you are liable to get hit with them when I throw them at you or in your direction. So sad but so true. I honestly can thank my father for this one. He was very sharp with the tongue and angry when I was small (life reasons I am sure). Thank God he aged out of it so therefore there is hope for me, but I don't want to be remembered that way by my children or my friends.)

1. Pray more (I need to be more diligent in my prayer life. Simple Obedience as our Pastor says. I seem to always remember to pray when I am in need of something, I want to pray when I don't and for others more. I want my friends to know that if they need a prayer lifted, they can call on me because I am faithful in that area of my life and I think if my children see me praying they may be more inclined to remember their own prayer lives. My actions will speak way louder than my words ever will.)

So with those 5 changes in my life, I think the rest will certainly fall into place. Will they make me a 7 min. miler! Heck no! Not that we ever have to worry about that happening, not in my DNA, but I think I have the exercise thing down pretty good. I have set those goals separately. I am making this year about "ME" changes. We will see how they go.

I have at least one friend (Christine) who is going to help keep #4 in check. I have to buy her a cup of coffee for every time she hears me say a certain word. She did say she would go easy on me and it didn't have to be Starbucks! Thank God for that. I might be broke soon......So friends and family, if you would all help me be accountable I would greatly appreciate it!

God Bless you and your families. May you keep your resolutions and may I keep mine. If I keep mine, I will be a much better person, friend, sister, daughter, wife and most importantly MOTHER! I hope that 2009 proves to be an outstanding year for each of you!