Thursday, August 21, 2008

Am I that out of shape?

Am I slow because I am out of shape? I have no idea why I struggle so some days (ok most days) or why my lungs do not want to seem to carry me through a short stupid 4 miles. Do I not push myself enough? Do I not cross train enough, have I not lost enough weight or body fat, do I eat so poorly that it doesn't fuel the runs? What the heck is the answer here and what am I doing wrong?

This is a recovery week so our mileage has been manageable. Not hard (until Sunday that is 11 miles) and we are supposed to recovering. I am not sure what I am recovering from since my last few attempts at running have sucked eggs royally and I am beginning to feel bad for my running partner as well as myself. I am holding her back and that is obvious by the heavy breathing I am doing, not able to carry a full conversation on, never the less talk much at all. Yet, Tamara is laughing, barely broken a sweat, laughing and of course being the best at mentally pushing me along. I told her leave me, I don't and would not want anyone to stay back with me because they picked me as their running partner. Kudos to her for being that good of a friend! Thanks, I appreciate you! But if you need to leave me, I will be sad and cry, but go on!

Right now I really am wondering what the heck I was thinking when I thought I could run 26.2 miles. I will not give up, but darn I feel so out of shape and it is really getting old and I don't know what else to do about it.

I am feeling a self pity party coming on. Did I really stop drinking for this? I might have to change that. Pity hates a party of one.

4 comments:

Happyrunningbunny said...

Please stop your pity party! You are doing just fine, and like I told you; I'm not leaving you because I enjoy running with you. I joined a running group to find someone I like to run with (YOU), not to try to become some elite runner.

Happyrunningbunny said...

I'd like to amend my previous comment. If you don't STOP beating yourself up and get back to the upbeat, funny running buddy that I know and love then I might just have to leave you!!!!

Kay said...

OK you can have a ONE DAY pity party and you have had it and it's over. You are doing awesome. Just wish I could be there with you guys. Just think it was because of you two I had almost decided to bag the half and go for the full marathon!!!!! And it sounds like I will have to join another group when I'm back running....you two are now the 9mm chicks!

Dena said...

You also need to remember (as it was recently pointed out to me) that these evening runs are hard--it's hot and you're tired from being at work all day. You'll be fresher on morning runs. Evening runs can be a struggle, no matter what shape you're in. And you're in great shape. You are NOTICEABLY faster than last year.